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  • Writer's picturePhilipp

Life’s Fall

Updated: Jan 28, 2022

A feeling that I am falling is overcoming me. Deeper and deeper into an abyss I cannot see. No one knows how deep this somber canyon is. No one knows where it ends.

Shreds of light from the opening above pepper the ever-present darkness, illuminating the walls of the canyon on their voyage. I am overcome by happiness as I take in the colors created by the light. Glorious colors, presenting an iridescent spectacle of hue and joy. The rough rock is speckled with shimmering crystals and precious stones. Amidst all this darkness, the glistening spots stand out like beacons. I find it challenging to take my eyes off them. This magical spectacle causes indescribable feelings whose description could fill an entire library. Incredible gratitude overcomes me. This dark and uncertain abyss no longer seems so frightening to me.

After what seems like an eternity, the ground appears. The darkness increases steadily. I feel like I am falling faster and faster. The ground is quickly and dangerously approaching. The beautiful, illuminated walls are barely palpable. The pale colors pass me by in a blur. Sheer panic overcomes me. My mind is screaming for help. Why did I not enjoy the beautiful wall longer? What is left for me now but the floor? Who has pushed me into this terrible ravine?

My gaze is fixed on the ground as I feel my heart stopping, my chest tightening, my mind panicking. I am falling further and further, faster and faster towards the ground. A quick moment of clarity overcomes me, the fog clearing for a little while. I turn around and up, looking at the opening I must have come from. Panic overtakes me now. Pearls of sweat start forming on my forehead. My mind is urging me to flee. I could forget the impact, not realize when the ground and my body finally collide. The end is already terribly close, the ground extremely black, the fall awfully empty.

I remind myself of the wonderful lights and the mesmerizing walls. A feeling of deep sorrow overcomes me, but I try smiling, looking back for one last glimpse. The opening above is growing smaller and smaller, but the light coming through shines brightly. I close my eyes. I am in the here and now. I think only about the fall, accepting the end of this journey, of the fall, of my life.

I turn towards the ground with excitement and acceptation. The floor has disappeared now. Instead I now see the opening hurtling towards me. What is happening here? I turn around again and see the opening above becoming smaller. I turn back and this time it grows wider.

The light grows brighter and brighter. I close my eyes. And I understand.

Painting by George Avdoulos

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